Well that's just outstanding. I have a suggested addition to their firm summary for the web site:

"Allow us to take the wheel and drive your legal problems away. If your business comes to a grinding halt, we will provide the lubricant so you can get back on the road to success. Our tag-team approach to problem-solving allows us to penetrate even the most challenging issues."

If I open a boutique firm and give it a prestigious website, will anyone buy it?

I envision a site where all text looks like fountain pen on parchment paper.

4:02 - looks like they already did that with their Chicago office. Belmont Avenue is solidly in 773 territory (on the North Side of the city), yet they got a 312 area code. Makes me wonder if their "primary" office phone is also their "primary" cell phone number.

I live right by their, um, office.

Next door to Addison & Butler, LLP, one can visit Good Morning Colonic and Skin Care.

Can one be Order of the Coif and cum laude at the same time? At my school, and at most schools I am familiar with, the math works out that you have to at least be magna cum laude to qualify for the Order.

"Can one be Order of the Coif and cum laude at the same time?"

I don't know, but apparently they can cum loudly. Bwaha.

These two kids both graduated from law school in 2004.

"Years of experience": what a Gallionesq statement.

I bet they know more about criminal law that corporate or real estate law.

4:40, it's possible. My school was a bit more stingy than magna, and magna came out to roughly top 5% of the class.

"a bit more stingy than yours w/r/t magna," I meant to say...

...as if anyone cares

"full service law firm":

hmm

I love how they describe their experience - "represented buyers and sellers in complex corporate mergers, stock purchases and asset purchases ranging in value from $200,000 to $200 million, and has provided general corporate advice to businesses both prior to and following such transactions" (the big firm practice that they left behind); "also represents individuals who have suffered personal injury as a result of someone else’s negligence" (the PI work they aspire to); "also handles legal matters in the areas of DUI defense, traffic violations and other criminal defense, divorces, landlord-tenant disputes and general real estate matters" (what they know they'll really be doing).

This is an entertaining site with a sordid pedigree, but overall it's no match for GSBarristers. I went back and checked their cached page at findlaw, just to be sure I wasn't misremembering, and I was right - G & S hit it completely out of the park. That record is going to stand for some time.

Well that's lovely. Proof that you can do anything short of murder (hell, maybe murder too) and still keep your license to practice law.

Anyone who doubts what liars these pricks are only needs to take a peek at their website, where they conveniently leave off their class years.

Assholes.

All I know is, one of them stole the other's graphic. Compare:

http://www.internalinvestigationlaw.com/

and

http://www.addisonbutler.com/1101.html

4:24,

Note that though their primary phone numbers are 312, their fax number is 773.

I'd say it's pretty sure that their primary phones are cell phones.

(1) I wonder what these biggest law firms are....

(2) Are they trying for a record number of local bar association memberships? Kinda odd to be a member of more than a dozen local bar associations, and yet only one federal court....

Snobs. These are two small time lawyers hustling to make a buck. Give em a break.

5:58, "hustling" is a good thing?

I'm a little hazy on my MPRE rules for lawyer advertising, but is it possible the website violates some ethics rules? If not, it seems like it should. As one of the other posters noted, leaving off class years, combined with the language "years of experience" seems designed to fool people into thinking they've been in practice for longer than they actually have.

6:14

good observation.

"years of experience,"-- technically, one could say 2 years is "years" of experience since it is more than one year.

5:58 listens to too much rap

5:14

they are two small time lawyers who only formed a firm together because they were fired from their jobs b/c they are sex offenders. So no, i think i can laugh at them guilt free.

I absolutely LOVE that they list DUIs as part of their practice. I'm sure they get a lot of business from their frat brothers... you know, the guys they used to drink and rape women with.

Someone should email them to solicit their services but ask when they graduated from school.

Also, suckfest.

eh... after the Duke lacrosse thing, maybe we should be a little hesitant to assume that these guys are sex offenders who didn't get caught.

8:53: Unlike the Duke defendants, who have pledged to fight the charges until they're proven innocent, these guys have already pled guilty to sex charges (although not the ones they were originally charged with).

4:40

Yes, and if your school really gives magna to everyone in the top ten percent, that's kind of ridiculous.

At my school, about 3-5 people per year get magna (which may be on the other end of the ridiculous spectrum)

WHTFH@5:44, excellent observation regarding the shared graphic.

Seriously, though, can you blame them? Is there anything quite so classic and symbolic as the white guy/white guy handshake motif?

at my school only one person got magna and it had been years since it happend

At my school, magna is easy to get - it's based on GPA, not class rank, so has become pretty much the top 25%. Summa is the tough one. I say Coif is the only thing that matters.

I don't think they stole the handshake graphic. It just looks like they shop at the same design-a-web-site shop.

As for Magna at Wisconsin:

Students graduating with a weighted average of 90 or better on reported numerical grades may be recommended by the faculty for graduation, summa cum laude.
Students graduating with a weighted average of 87.5 or better on reported numerical grades may be recommended by the faculty for graduation, magna cum laude.
Students who graduate with a weighted average of 85.5 or better on reported numerical grades may be recommended by the faculty for graduation, cum laude.

87.5 corresponds to somewhere around top 8-10%

Fake. Fake. Fake. One of these guys was doing real estate (selling, not transactions) the last I heard of him. No way they consummated their love for each other by going into business together.

Legal services nationwide? They're only licensed in 2 states - that's called practicing law w/o a license in the other 48 + DC.

Their business address is an apartment in the Lakeview area of Lincoln Park - only a short hop skip and a jump from "Boys Town." Perhaps a merger with Charney would be an appropriate outcome.

How can they still practice? Couldn't they get disbarred for what they pled guilty to?

5:58 and 8:53 -- Read the links and get to know the backs tory. The posters aren't making fun of these losers just for the website, or idly speculating that they might be sex offenders due to their frat boy image. There are guilty pleas and sworn statements confirming that they are dirtbags!!

9:08PM, according to the earlier post, they pled guilty to "reckless endangerment of safety and sexual gratification in public."

I'm not sure what the first charge is about, but the second one sounds like people getting it on in the back seat of a car. If that's actually all these guys did, they probably deserve a break.

If they're actually rapists who got away, though, they deserve whatever bad stuff happens to them for the rest of their lives.

I think we're going to see more firms develop joint M&A/slip-and-fall practice groups. The synergies are undeniable.

9:30am

I did google satellite map search of address (super zoom), and it surely does look like a regular street with lowrise buildings and store fronts.

On the other hand, these two men probably were in dire straits. With their reputation probably in shatters, they probably could not find legal employment. Starting a new law office in a fancy building can be a very expensive undertaking.

I suppose blogs are designed to encourage anonymous mudslinging, but this is insane!

Entertain this hypothetical: these guys did nothing wrong except hook up with a crazy chick who accused them of rape. The fact is they plead to charges that have absolutely NO ASPECT of physical force or violence - and certainly NO ASPECT of rape. Nor does the record contain proof of any rape, sexual assault, or physcial violence of any kind. Bottom line is that no one except these guys and the alleged victim knows exactly what happened. If they didn't sexually assault this woman, then their careers have been permanently damaged and most posters on this blog are only adding to the damage. SHAME ON YOU!

Since lawyers don't drink, I suppose no one on this blog has ever had a few cocktails and done something of questionable judgment. Hypocrisy always runs rampant when people don't have to own up to their judgments of others.

Margaret: Don't blame blogs, blame the MSM. They're much more powerful, and they're the ones pushing the "these guys got off easy" story:

http://www.jsonline.com/story/index.aspx?id=553312

This blog, and the commenters, are just adding their two cents to what the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel reported.

And I had a few words for the Journal Sentinel as well:

http://www.jsonline.com/story/index.aspx?id=554732

And let's be honest - this blog and the commenters would be adding their two cents regardless of the Journal Sentinel reporting.

You think the law office of Addison & Butler, LLP is taking resumes and would be interested in recent graduates of second tier law schools?

Margaret: Good letter to the editor.

A question: Do you have any personal connection to the defendants?

To those of you who think their office phone is a mobile, you are living in the 1990s.

These days you can get a phone number in just about any area code that has numbers available and have it ring anywhere in the world you have an internet connection with a $15/month Vonage or SunRocket account. For $5/month more, you can get additional numbers in additional area codes that ring the same phone.

Why they wouldn't shell out another $10/month for a fax number in the same area code as their voice line is beyond me.

that letter to the editor doesn't add much value. yes, the judge can exercise discretion, but the critics' point is that this was a poor exercise of judicial discretion.

To those griping about their stated "years of experience"... Actually both men were admitted to the Illinois Bar in 2003. They did work at their respective firms up until the very day of their convictions. That's 3 1/2 years each at both firms, seven years total between the two of them. To say "years of experience" isn't misleading.

If you do a simple reverse number lookup on the internet, you will find that their office numbers are Sprint cell phones.

The letter write is same class year as the clowns, so probably, yes, there is a connection.

Good God people, you really need to find more to do with your time. Doing a reverse look up on a phone number and looking up the address with satellite maps is simply pathetic.

Anon, 9:15 am,

And you need to find more to do with your time than wasting your time by commenting on a comment that you find to be a waste of time.

Idiots. Honestly, after being convicted and pleading guilty. They go and open up an LLC and post it on the internet where people can easily see their recent criminal record.

Morons.

This post is on the first page of Google hits for Gallion & Spielvogel

these two are such d-bags... I hope they enjoy traffic court.
I wonder the connection of that girl above...