first

My firm's theme song is "Sanitarium" by Metallica. We sing it during morning calisthenics.

This cannot be real. Anyone could do this in 2 hours with semi-decent equipment. Why someone would spend even 2 hours to do this I have no idea.

I bet it was made for a internal firm parody.

Any precedent for a law firm winning a Grammy?

that is the worst thing I've ever heard.
I interviewed at Nixon a few years ago and they had the cheesiest recruiting video also....horrible.

The late 80s quality of the song is amazing. I seems like the kind of firm where Melanie Griffith would be your secretary and a young Robert Downey Jr. would win over a tough jury in a major case with his clumsy, yet endearing antics.

Lat, let me be the first to agree, this is awful!

Lat, let me be the first to agree, this is awful!

Worst unreleased Prince song ever.

If you're feeling really brave listen to the KPMG theme song, link beloew.

"You are probably thinking, "Theme song? Why the hell would a consulting company have a theme song?" Well you see, that's because you are not insane, as the people at KPMG most assuredly are. They comissioned an anthem entitled VISION OF GLOBAL STRATEGY. Freakish Soviet-era lyrics include:

"KPMG/We're strong as can be
A dream of power and energy
We go for the goal
Together we hold
On to our vision of global strategy..."

http://www.gearchange.org/descriptions/KPMG%20-%20KPMG%20(As%20Strong%20As%20Can%20Be).html

Was that Billy Ocean doing back up?

Thank you, I hate my firm just a little bit less. A little.

Be sure to let us know when it goes platinum.

The lyrics, the production quality, the talent of the singers... I am speechless. This made my morning.

hahahaha

DAMMIT, the chorus IS stuck in my head.

Everyone's a winner at Nixon Peabody, everyone's a winner at Nixon Peabody...

Maybe this theme song was a smart idea for the firm!

I believe Roxette would have been a better choice for male-female duo

This musician-turned-lawyer is truly astonished.

"We've got the culture..."...? Holy shite. If there's a market out there to produce these songs, then I'm in the wrong fracking business, man.

Just....just....wow.

Rap would be a better medium for this stuff.

Biglaw people are into money and into comparing themselves and their institutions favorably to other people and other people's institutions.

What they're thinking isn't "everyone's a winner here." It's more like "I have more money and get more respect than you do."

I'm waiting for the Cravath video that talks about "PPP to the s-k-y" and asserts that the other firms "bend over like Charney."

This reminds me of that Gigi D'Agostino duet "I still believe in your eyes, there is no choice I belong to your thighs..."--or however that went.

Excellent. That's definitely the other guy from Wham.

But if they were reaching for platinum, it's obvious that the chorus should have been:

Everyone's a hottie/
At Nixon Peabody

Oh my god.....

Nixon Peabody has jumped the shark

Trying to fend off a merger?

Say PPP (PPP!) I like to say with pride
Now when you do it, do it well and make sure that it counts
You're now down with a discount

You down with PPP? (Yeah you know me)

You down with PPP? (Yeah you know me)

You down with PPP? (Yeah you know me)

Who's down with PPP? (Only if you got EQUITY)

The BREAKDOWN. That breakdown is incredible. And then the build up back to the chorus, man. I am actually feeling this song.

Throw your hands up if you rep Davis Polk
We'll sue your ass dead if you treat us like a joke
Our litigators are better than OJ's Dream Team
We don't interview the "crop," we take the cream of the cream
Our profits are fat, our strategies scary
You have a business book, we have a business library

Don't think if you work here, you'll lack respect
All our associates cash big checks
You might sleep at your desk or work all night
But in year-end bonuses we'll make it all right

Nixon Peabody...you are awarded no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

The real question: Who are the ad wizards who came up with this one?

Also, how much were these ad wizards paid? I'm guessing over 50k.

It is real - it was rolled out during a state of the firm meeting last year.

Mc Hammer called... he wants shis song back

I have reserved a very special place for child molesters, Michael Vick, and those who were responsible for this hideousness. See all of you soon.

this is real. i'm going to remain anonymous. this is official. what's more is that is that there is another theme song that has a more alma mater type pace to it. if i can find it i'll let you know.

I just threw up a little bit in my mouth listening to that.

Who hasn't thrown up in their mouth? Get original. I see that posted almost daily.

Did Billy Merck compose this?

Would this work for anyone? I mean, can you get clients with a BAD, BAD, BAD song? The type of clients they're looking for are probably into adult contemporary radio, but this is still ridiculously awful. I hope no real money was spent on this - I hope it was an act of charity from some of the firm's current employees (or something they were forced into doing).

Further, I agree, the idea of a firm anthem makes me throw up in my mouth. I mean - a 4 minute song is not a jingle or a fight song. Why is this thing so damn long?

They should have done the same thing that they did at the end of the Simpsons Movie - put some lyrics over a known, public domain tune.

And thanks, 10:50, for a great Billy Madison reference.

We're gonna funk this up and take it out on tour.

I work at NP, and I have to say I've never heard this before. I'd be pretty horrified as well if it was real, but I don't think it is.

This is nothing -- NOTHING -- compared to the knock-off version of "One" that those Bank of America jackasses unveiled at a corporate retreat.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qAuqq1LFnU

How very Tina Turner!

This would be a total winner at Eurovision.

This is truly heinous.

The scariest think about the BofA video is that the dude singing (who actually has a halfway decent voice) is doing the whole rock star close-your-eyes-and sway thing throughoput the performance. One Bank, One Card. Now and forever.

You are the wind beneath my wings.

I wondered what the Gap Band had been doing all these years. Truly hideous.

App State tried to backtrack and call this recruiting video an inside joke. k...

http://www.ifilm.com/player/?ifilmId=2679633&pg=default&skin=default&refsite=7202&mediaSize=default&context=product&launchVal=1&data=&realId=2679633&bw=300&mt=WMP

Does Nixon Peabody have a Happy Hour where they bring out the karoke machine and sing their anthem?

That is plain awful and embarassing. Wow. If I am Chairman of Nixon Peabody, then I am calling emergency meeting to have that theme song shit-canned.

11:13, how long have you been at the firm? According to 11:02, this was rolled out last year.

Oh my science...

That's got noting on PricewaterhouseCoopers' theme song "Your World, Our People"

Someone even set it to a sweet video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsAYtrHTKZ4

Enjoy it while you can. I bet the Nixon Peabody people will have it yanked from YouTube any minute now.

it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all it's a small, small world

11:29 is right, the B of A dude actually can sing. If he weren't some middle-aged bank manager, he could try out for American Idol.

Between this and still paying 145 in DC, their recruiting just went down the shitter.

This is SO embarrassing. Can I rescind my acceptance of NP's offer?

So, that's what happened to Chaka Khan.

The Mofonics are far superior, though I can't seem to find their songs on MoFo's website anymore. Sad.

God help me, I kind of like it.

May God have mercy on my soul.

-- ET!

They start their LI associates, in an office within spitting distance to Manhattan, only like $95,000, but have money to pay the Pointer Sisters to sing this crap? Shameful.

I'm with 12:21. I've listened to it a few times, and it's starting to grow on me...

The guy in the BoA "One" cover, Ethan Chandler, can sing because, as one blogger put it, he "isn't a banker who thinks he's a musician; he's a musician whose dayjob is in a bank."

The story becomes more ATL-relevant when Universal Music sends a cease-and-desist letter to BoA for violating U2 copyright.

I don't know what was worse, this or the Blue(book) balls post yesterday.

It is NOT a parody. They made it when the firm was awarded best place to work by fortune magazine as a "gift" to the employees. Not only that, but there was a VIDEO to go with it- with african american singers crooning in a studio. It was horrendus on every level- made you want to cringe and hide under your chair when they presented it at a state of the firm meeting. the partners were all congratulating each other on it. I'm so glad this finally made its way public so people can see that NP is NOT one of the best places to work by any standard.

If you're going to do this, you have to fully commit and hire Hasselhoff to do the song. C'mon NP. You're better than this.

12:50 -- Best. Post. Ever.

Wow. Really, wow. It's not stuck in my head (whew!), but I do suddenly feel the urge to wear shoulder pads and a banana clip.

Amazing that the people that produced this had the thought that this is good work.. Who greenlighted this shit? As bad as "Cop Rock" from the 80's.

I think they stole part of the Clash's bass line from Train in Vain.

I love the "WHOO!" and "YEAH YEAH YEAH" that kick everything off.

I was waiting for M.C. Hammer to bust out of the background and rejoin his former chorus in an angry, awe inspiring rap about how his life in the mailroom is just making him want to sing (and dance) his a** off. "Used to make money; now I make friends. Used to push bentleys; now I push book ends."

The next song on the soundtrack is "I'm Walking On Sunshine."

When can we start the misheard lyrics game?

Appalachian is Hot Hot Hot

Reason 4,759 why lawyers should not be allowed to market themselves.

Well, I guess this makes it official. The terrorists have won.

I have a friend who used to work there. no wonder he jumped ship. run from the bad themesong and bad pay- run as fast as you can! I think a lot of people are leaving in droves.

Anybody who uses the term "folks" to refer to business people are retarded.

Is there any way to download that? I want to put it on every CD I make from now on...

I was wondering when the Chicago Bears would release a follow-up to "Super Bowl Shuffle."

OMFG, NP pwned by their own theme song FTL.

One Bank, One Card

I covered the BofA guy covering U2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KC4cn-GIeGM&NR=1

I am glad I am no longer an associate there. Most everything sucked, but this truly reinforces any reasons I had for leaving. I had heard how bad this was from some of my friends who were left behind (yes, this song is very real). I am so embarassed for them.

They should have their digital rights expert step in and shut this down:

On youtube:

“The industry doesn’t have the best history of figuring out what is in its best interests,” said Laurin Mills, digital-rights expert and partner at Washington-based law firm Nixon Peabody.

“The change in technology is going to drive the change in business model over time, and until the next business model becomes obvious you will get this kind of tension.”

http://www.meathmedia.com/blog/musings/archive/2006_10_01_archive.html

And that is when everyone is a winner at Nixon Pea___Body, Pulling for Eachother is our Community!

Just wait for the Bangle, Bangle, Bangle P-town P-funk remix--Timbaland is at work in the lab now over in VaBeach.

I can't believe my ears!! NP has totally lost their minds!!!

Why do I have the sudden urge to go out and buy a home-perm kit and a Bedazzler?

Love the tipster's comment: "the product of a misguided recruiting effort and wasted bonus dollars." Too funny.

I wonder if that "trial" version of digital media converter (like most trial software) had a shrinkwrap license or click-thru license that expressly stated that the trial version is not for commercial use.

This song reminds me of a really bad Super Bowl halftime show, courtesy of some group with a name like Up With Life.

Good God. As a current Nixon Peabody employee, I am truly embarrassed. Perhaps they should have taken the $$ it took to make this mess and used it as bonuses for the staff. As the Powers- That-Be at NP strive for the ridiculous (like making those stupid lists, not to mention this song), the underpaid, under-appreciated staff get left in the dust.

Jesus H. Tapdancing Christ!

This is possibly the worst thing I've ever heard.

"Ooooooooo, yeah!!!!"

absolutely unbelievable. I couldn't make it through 20 seconds without cringing so much it hurt

According to YouTube, the video (up for about 12 hours) has been viewed more than 10,000 times.

For today it is the #27 - Most Viewed - Entertainment.

That's a mean slap bass....did they get Flea to play on this?

Anyone who knows anything about NP recognizes that this song exemplifies the firm's management's signature combination of egomania and idiocy.

I wonder if that "trial" version of digital media converter (like most trial software) had a shrinkwrap license or click-thru license that expressly stated that the trial version is not for commercial use.

Dey stole this shit from me and my boys in Sexual Chocolate!

Ughhhh I think I just threw up in my mouth...

They still paying folks to take those surveys that rate them as Best Place To Work.

Oh well - no longer viewable. I have no way of enjoying the merriment as NP thinks it is worth protecting their copyright on it.

Folks, this is real! I know, I know. But it's real.

The first minute or so when it premiered at the State of the Firm address in 2006, no one knew if it was ok to laugh or not. Sometime before the breakdown, I couldn't contain myself. I belted out a roaring laughter that was quickly echoed by nearly everyone in attendance (staff).

To this day, we still aren't sure if the higher-ups thought this was actually a good song or if this was a joke reflecting a kind of humor that we "winners" have never encountered here.

I think the real winners are the people who got paid (probably a handsome sum) to crap this garbage out.

Oh, no wonder I couldn't remember it. I was gone by that time.

Where is it? The Youtube link is alas dead!

Here's a new YouTube link, to a short parody video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7SeL6i3sHM0

This song is very much real. I recalled its debut as a summber associate at NP and, quite honestly, the song is as bad as the firm itself -- I had a horriffic experience there as a summer and I fail to see how Fortune magazine (or any magazine for that matter) would honor this place. I am glad to see that the firm is suffering just a tad of public embarassment from this theme song, opps, I mean internal "NP sprit song" (or whatever it is) fiasco.

My theme song after four years working at NP would be:
A terrible place to work.. (With some exceptions) the powers that be are all jerks. Far from "teams and respect," you'd get "screams and/or negelct." For a place that is lawful, they are really truly ... "
Well, you get the picture. But seriously, my biggest regret about Nixon is not leaving earlier than I did. A badly run place.

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