Are You There God? Yes, I Am
Time for a quick update on a recent Lawsuit of the Day -- the case filed by Nebraska state senator Ernie Chambers, against God. Yes, God.
From the AP (via TaxProf Blog):
A legislator who filed a lawsuit against God has gotten something he might not have expected: a response.One of two court filings from "God" came Wednesday under otherworldly circumstances, according to John Friend, clerk of the Douglas County District Court in Omaha.
"This one miraculously appeared on the counter. It just all of a sudden was here -- poof!" Friend said.
Or maybe the court clerks didn't notice when it was dropped off, since they were too busy gabbing about why Tyra picked a chick with Asperger's for America's Next Top Model.
More after the jump.
The AP article continues:
[Sen. Chambers] said he's trying to make the point that anybody can sue anybody.Not so, says "God." His response argues that the defendant is immune from some earthly laws and the court lacks jurisdiction.
It adds that blaming God for human oppression and suffering misses an important point.
"I created man and woman with free will and next to the promise of immortal life, free will is my greatest gift to you," according to the response, as read by Friend.
There was no contact information on the filing, although St. Michael the Archangel is listed as a witness, Friend said.
A second response from "God" disputing Chambers' allegations lists a phone number for a Corpus Christi law office. A message left for that office was not immediately returned Thursday.
Does anyone have copies of the Divine Pleadings? If so, we'd love to see them. Thanks.
P.S. A tipster who used to live in Lincoln adds:
Just so you know, that's actually a picture of Ernie Chambers on the floor of the Nebraska legislature. Short-sleeve sweatshirts are what he wears to legislate. He was nuts when I lived there, so it's good that some things haven't changed.
God Files Answer in Lawsuit Blaming Him for World's Troubles [TaxProf Blog]
'God' responds to legislator's lawsuit [CNN]
God Answers Law Suit from Nebraska Senator [NPR]
Comments
First, finally!
Posted by: First | September 21, 2007 12:04 PM
Does the AP get that the "Corpus Christi law office" is probably a joke?
Posted by: Anonymous | September 21, 2007 12:07 PM
That fan behind him in the picture is just perfectly placed to make it look like a halo.
Posted by: Anonymous | September 21, 2007 12:21 PM
Excellent point, 12:21. It's a good thing you pointed that out, because it's not incredibly self-evident. Also, apparently this guy is suing God. God!
Posted by: Anonymous | September 21, 2007 12:25 PM
We are coming out with a whole line of gear aimed at the busy & athletic legislator.
Posted by: Nike | September 21, 2007 12:30 PM
I called in sixth to work today!
Posted by: I'm always sixth | September 21, 2007 12:42 PM
Was it a Friend of the court brief? (rimshot).
Posted by: Anon | September 21, 2007 12:51 PM
Don't t(e)ase me, bro!
Posted by: God | September 21, 2007 01:02 PM
Am I the only former clerk not surprised by this? We used to get these things all the time--though I will admit we never got one naming God as a defendant.
Posted by: ExCamera | September 21, 2007 01:15 PM
This guy was the plaintiff from Marsh v. Chambers. Apparently, if you can't banish religion from the public square, you mock it in the hopes of getting some cheap publicity. What a waste of time and tax dollars.
Posted by: Anon | September 21, 2007 01:38 PM
Filed by a guy named Chambers? (another rimshot)
Posted by: Anon | September 21, 2007 01:39 PM
ExCamera,
A fed clerk here. Sure, these cases come in all the time..... from people who are insane.
This is from a state senator.
Posted by: Anonymous | September 21, 2007 02:26 PM
I wonder if God cited Mayo v. Satan and His Staff - I'm pretty sure I remember that case holding that Satan, as the Prince of Darkness, had immunity from suit under the Foreign Sovereign Immunities Act.
I'm assuming that being the LORD, or, in His Jesus form, KING of the Jews and/or the Prince of Peace should similarly apply.
Similarly, Mayo failed to properly serve Satan; is there any reason to believe that God was properly served?
Posted by: Anonymous | September 21, 2007 02:44 PM
Did God pay the filing fee?
Posted by: Nitro | September 21, 2007 05:53 PM
Some practical considerations of suing the Almighty:
1) Claiming privilege becomes a bitch. If He is all-knowing, your privilege has been waived before its inception.
2) Seems this should be a class action. I kinda have my reservations about the lead plaintiff, though.
3) Poor court reporter who will take down fire and brimstone for deposition answers.
4) Satan certainly seems a party here without whose presence this cannot be adequately resolved. But, once Satan is named as a defendant, every lawyer in this country will be conflicted out of representing the plaintiff.
5) Does Jesus have any liability as an agent? And will the Jewish Bar Association be permitted to file an amicus brief in support of Jesus, arguing that there is no agency relationship between him and the principal defendant? Would Jesus be estopped from denying agency?
6) The Catholic Church can be named as a RICO enterprise. Treble damages, baby!
7) If you win (assuming the world doesn't end as per Dogma), can you garnish the church offerings?
8) How would the defendant testify if the case is heard in a courtroom where there is no window above the witness stand through which a beam of light can shine?
9) This is in Nebraska? This is forum non conveniens for ANYBODY, even this defendant.
10) If the defendant counterclaims for equitable relief, there goes your unclean hands defense.
Posted by: AMK | September 21, 2007 06:44 PM
AMK - Classic - truly classic.
Posted by: Anon | September 21, 2007 09:12 PM
*squeezes*
Posted by: anon | September 21, 2007 11:36 PM
*slurps*
Posted by: pip | September 21, 2007 11:37 PM
AMK - great work
Posted by: at home | September 21, 2007 11:39 PM
54 F.R.D. 282
Posted by: anon | September 22, 2007 12:55 AM
Am I the only one who thought it was a picture of Morgan Freeman at first? I need to stop watching the Almighty movies.
Posted by: Anonymous | September 23, 2007 03:45 AM
3:45:
You are not alone.
Posted by: Anonymous | September 23, 2007 12:10 PM
Come on now AMK, cut the Church some slack. We're the chosen people. As I like to say, we're "the new jew."
Posted by: JAC | September 23, 2007 09:46 PM