first!

I'm a pathetic loser, with no sort of life whatsoever. How bad is my life? My biggest joy comes from posting "first" on a blog. Any questions?

*crawls back into lonely hole*

Lat,

Have you considered posts related to the following fringe benefits?: car service (and associated policies); late work meal ordering; sports leagues (i.e. volleyball) and other firm-funded activities (i.e. book club); happy-hours and monthly mixers?

saldy?

I second 11:19's idea. Good topic

I'm an even more pathetic loser, with no sort of life whatsoever. How bad is my life? My biggest joy comes from monitoring who is attempting to post first on a blog and then raining on their admittedly pitiful parade. Any questions?

*crawls back into lonely hole*

Don't taze me bro! Oh, that's a defibrillator? Ok then, go ahead!

Cravath has them too.

Actually my firm just has security guards with tasers. Same thing right?

Houston to air-conditioned work environments

Houston to air-conditioned work environments

Who needs a discount on a GM vehicle?!? They may as well throw in "office free of vagrants and rabid dogs" or "running water in the bathrooms"

I bet every firm has them, who cares?

http://www.law.com/jsp/tx/specials.jsp?p=perks07

Houston to 120v power outlets for company laptops

what's a defbrillator? :)

what's a defbrillator? :)

Shoe-shining!! That's what I could use. Which firms have that free perk?

If you magnify the picture, the instructions say "To be used only in servicing partners." Which, judging by the FJ associate that staffed the case opposite me, will be very unfortunate.

Lat, how about a post on downpayment assistance for buying apartments? I believe S&C offers a loan of around $100k for that purpose. Don't know about other firms.

11:54 - someone who wants to buy a GM vehicle. Please return your law degree.

I personally like the in-office tailoring and shoe shines. All they need to round out the list is free massages (happy ending extra).

At my old firm, they washed your car twice a month and offered chair massage twice a week. My secretary threw in the twice a week hand job for free.

Dechert Philly just announced their purchase of defibrillators and offered 10-minute demonstrations to anyone interested.

When I was interviewing at a big ATL firm's NYC office, an associate had a defib kit on the wall of his office because he had just recently had a heart attack at his desk at 3am. Luckily, his coworker with whom he shared an office was around to get him to the hospital. I think he has since left for the sunny (and less life-threatening) south.

401(k) eligibility after one hour of service to the firm....

To the tipster: the message to new associates is not "We anticipate that you may be afflicted with cardiac arrest while working here." The message is, "when you are afflicted with cardiac arrest while working here, we'll give you a chance to survive. Unlike other biglaw firms, where you will die a horrible death alone in your office and we will yell at your corpse for being late with the brief."

To the tipster: the message to new associates is not "We anticipate that you may be afflicted with cardiac arrest while working here." The message is, "when you are afflicted with cardiac arrest while working here, we'll give you a chance to survive. Unlike other biglaw firms, where you will die a horrible death alone in your office and they will yell at your corpse for being late with the brief."

When I was at WFG there was a partner who had a heart attack in the office and died in the pre-defibrillator era (in the sense that few places, if any, had the sense to purchase them). After that they bought a bunch and had at least one set per floor with trainings on how to operate them for anyone who was interested. Good idea to have them around generally, not much of an associate perk when you consider that the partners are more likely to be of an age and health status to require that somebody have to restart their heart.

If you need to have a defibrillator near you at all times, I think its time to buy one of those medic-alert necklaces you see on that tv ad with all the old ppl falling down.

Sick room -- so you can continue to bill while ill.

Ropes NY has an AED as well as CPR training (non-mandatory, of course) for staff and attorneys.

I was once tasked as a paralegal to shop for defibrillators for the office. Of course, the partner who had me do this was a hypochondriac, but I also got to shop for a Boston Whaler and a home in the Hamptons. None of it was billable.

Remember to ask for a raise BEFORE you jolt a partner. Once you save his life, it's already too late.

I have it from a reliable source that Fulbright also offers wall to wall carpeting, central heat and a/c and indoor plumbing in its office. Forget Cravath. Houston here I come!!!

automated external defibrilator.

First!

11:38 ("don't taze me bro") -- TOO FUNNY!

Seriously, I am as advertised above and a Paramedic Supervisor, too. In 17 years, I have never made a cardiac arrest in the offices of a law firm (lots in Mexican restaurants, though). Non-fatal heart attacks, yes. Cardiac arrests, no.

Now if they get to take that sucker home with them . . . .