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From the Department of Dubious Defenses

world's greatest dad mug Above the Law blog.jpgDefendants in deep doo-doo come up with all sorts of innovative defenses. Last week, we learned that fashion mogul Dov Charney, accused of sexually harassing a former employee, claimed in a deposition that when he appeared before the plaintiff wearing nothing but a strategically placed sock, he was merely testing a new line of underwear.

But this is even more dubious. At a murder trial underway in New York, a father accused of killing his seven-year-old stepdaughter has introduced into evidence a "World's Greatest Dad" mug she once bought for him.

If the mug has writing on it, you must acquit.

'World's Greatest Dad' Mug Seen In Nixzmary Trial [wcbstv.com]
Implausible defense department [Overlawyered]

Comments
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Posted by 1 | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:06 AM

1

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:15 AM

That doesn't rhyme, Lat. You suck.

How about doing a story on the sailor who molested the little girl on the airplane, and when the stewardess asked him why he was touching her (caressing her lips) he said he was just trying to wake her up?

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:18 AM

Is he trying to introduce the mug as evidence that he actually IS the "world's greatest dad"?

Because I think that might be hearsay.

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:29 AM

If she bought him a mug, acquit the thug.

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:29 AM

There's nothing funny about the Nixmary Brown case.

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:31 AM

Good call, 1018... though the declarant is unavailable, because the defendant killed her (or so the prosecution contends).

1015, "it" does indeed rhyme with "acquit" The flow is a little weak, but it *is* a rhyme.

If the mug spells it out, there's reasonable doubt...?

Like Shakira's hips, the mug don't lie; Read my lips, state's got the wrong guy...?

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Posted by President & Supreme Ruler George W. Bush | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:36 AM

10:29(2) - You're wrong. I think those comments are pretty funny.

And before you feel sorry for the girl, remember, the whole country benefits from her death. How, you ask? Well, there will be one less prostitute/drug addict out there that constantly produces mini-prostitutes/drug addicts. Thus, that really high percentage that comes out of our salaries for taxes will go toward something that matters. Like The War On Terror.

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:37 AM

Where does this guy's lawyer get the balls? I mean, seriously, in his opening statement he claimed that the murdered 7 y/old was responsible for her own death as she was such a "terror" and that the defendant’s rage over the half-eaten cup of yogurt that ultimately led to this little girl's death was justified as there was so little food in the house.

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:39 AM

Wait, I just read that it was actually just a *photo* of the mug introduced into evidence, not the mug itself.

Best evidence rule, anyone???

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Posted by President & Supreme Ruler George W. Bush | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:39 AM

10:37 confirms the fact that this child would have been a drain on our economy.

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:40 AM

The day my kid gives me a "world's greatest dad mug," is the day I realize I'm a shitty parent.

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Posted by President & Supreme Ruler George W. Bush | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 10:47 AM

Wow, no response from those crazy liberals. That must prove that my above points are right...

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Posted by @10:40 | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 11:01 AM

Only if your kid pre-fills it with FLAVIA.

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 11:26 AM

I have a "world's greatest dad" shirt. But in all honesty, I'm not sure how official these rankings really are.

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Posted by Flavia Machine | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 11:31 AM

Worlds Greatest Dad holds my urine...

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 11:32 AM

Worlds Greatest Dad mug was donated to Two Girls One Cup

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 11:33 AM

Worlds Greatest Dad mug was donated to Two Girls One Cup

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 11:34 AM

I for one would like to see more "mini-prostitutes" -- so George W. this is bad news!

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Posted by Two Girls One Cup turns me on | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 11:36 AM

I for one would like to see a T-shirt that reads "World's Greatest Dad and Lover"...

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Posted by Heath Ledger | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 11:37 AM

World's Greatest Dad killed me!

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Posted by Money's all that matters | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 12:02 PM

What is this year's bonus for being worlds greatest dad? (regular plus special, please)

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Posted by A.Non.E.Mous | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 12:08 PM

Shouldn't there also have been a claim against the mother for naming the poor kid Nixzmary!

How do you even pronounce a name with an X followed by a Z followed by an M?

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 1:09 PM

12:08, it's a lot like the word "eczema"

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 1:10 PM

The Z is silent. "Nix Mary" is unfortunate foreshadowing

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Posted by Mr. Mxyzptlk | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 1:36 PM

Nixzmary is a fine name

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Posted by A.Non.E.Mous | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 2:13 PM

1:09: Yeah, but eczema is not spelled exzema or exzmema.

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 2:24 PM

A.Non.E.Mous, the linked article has a video clip where they pronounce the girl's name.

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 3:06 PM

May poor little Nixmary Browns parents rot in hell and may that hell begin yesterday! Maybe someone in the courtromo will take that mug and smash that SOB in the head with it.

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Posted by Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum! | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 3:09 PM

"World's Greatest?"

He thinks he's *better* than me?!

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Posted by Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum! | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 3:16 PM

"World's Greatest?"

He thinks he's *better* than me?!

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Posted by Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum! | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 3:20 PM

"World's Greatest?"

He thinks he's *better* than me?!

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Posted by Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum! | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 3:25 PM

"World's Greatest?"

He thinks he's *better* than me?!

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Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 3:47 PM

lol, 11:26.

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Posted by What did he say? | Permalink Thursday, January 24, 2008 3:53 PM

3:09
3:16
3:20

Hilarious, but don't wear it out...

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