* "Lawyers' writing skills still bad." [National Law Journal]

* We should have included him in our Lawyer of the Day poll: While in Tallahassee filing papers to run for Broward County public defender, criminal defense attorney Gary Ostrow got arrested for cocaine possession. [JAABlog]

* Loro Piana's new tactic for protecting their intellectual property rights. [Fashionista]

* Former judge (and SCOTUS nominee) Robert Bork settles slip-and-fall suit against Yale Club. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Professor Laura Appleman supplements the list (previously noted here) of "Classes My Top-Tier Law School Should Have Offered as Warnings About the Profession." [The Faculty Lounge]

* A popular (but unsurprising) beneficiary of unclaimed class-action funds: law schools. [Point of Law]

* Before she was famous. [Althouse]

* Not really law-related, but interesting: top colleges are admitting lots of students from wait lists this year. [New York Times]

* If you're a student or alumnus of a state school and have a professor you really dislike, try this: FOIA the contents of his or her work email account. [West Virginia Record; Charleston Daily Mail]

* John McCain and judicial nominations: he goes both ways. Also, on Obama: "Senator Obama in particular likes to talk up his background as a lecturer on law...." [FN1] [Washington Briefs]

* Jeez -- some people can be so thin-skinned. Thank God for the pro-free-speech tilt of American libel law. [AFP via Drudge Report]

* From a tipster: "A Dunkin Donuts worker was arrested for installing a video camera in the women's bathroom. His name is 'Danish,' and he serves pastries. C'mon!" [ABC News (video)]

* John Quinn of Quinn Emanuel isn't the only high-powered Californian who shuns the shift key. Meet Jerry Yang of Yahoo (make that yahoo). [Deal Journal]

* There's still time left to vote in our latest caption contest, but don't delay. Polls close soon. [ATL]

[FN1] Yes, Obama's formal title at U. Chicago was "Senior Lecturer." But even the school itself refers to him as "a professor in the Law School." We're construing McCain's "lecturer" reference as a dig.

* "Classes My Top-Tier Law School Should Have Offered as Warnings About the Profession." Our favorite: "Forwarding E-mails: Theory and Practice." [McSweeney's]

* An $8 million windfall for WVU Law School, courtesy of unclaimed class-action settlement money. [Charleston Gazette]

* Jessica Utovich, the scheduler / paramour of Ohio attorney general Marc Dann, in an email to her boss: "I try my hardest to make sure you are taken care of." Maybe she shouldn't have tried so hard. [Daily Briefing / Columbus Dispatch]

* When you try to give your client basic grooming tips, and he responds by calling you "the Lucky Charms leprechaun," it's time to start looking for a new line of work. [Miami Herald]

* Did you know that today is International Midwives' Day? [The Mommy Blawg via Blawg Review]

* And in other blog carnival developments, check out the May Carnival of Trust, hosted by DLA Piper's David Donoghue. [Chicago IP Litigation Blog]

* Judge Richard Posner (one of the world's top 100 public intellectuals) has co-authored a paper concluding that "politics is a particularly good predictor of judicial voting." Download it while it's hot, recommends Professor David Zaring. [Conglomerate; SSRN]

* Keker & Van Nest want out of "teledildonics" litigation. Wonder why? [The Prior Art]

* In another Keker case, L'Affaire AutoAdmit, Anthony Ciolli has filed a pro se motion to quash. [Legal Satyricon]

* Now on Broadway: Laurence Fishburne as Thurgood Marshall. Seriously. And according to the reviews, the show's not bad. [WSJ Law Blog]

* It's not your imagination; the news / gossip cycle has been a little slow lately. But have no fear, Judge Halverson is here. [Wild Wild Law]

* Speaking of strong women in the law, Alice Fisher -- the diva-licious leader of the Justice Department's Criminal Division -- is departing from the DOJ later this month. [BLT]

* Have briefcase, will travel. Just don't bill the client $875 an hour for it. [TaxProf Blog]

* Congress may hold hearings on the Milberg scandal. We hope they happen, 'cause they'd be great fun to watch (and liveblog). [Reuters]

* People love law shows. So why didn't the planned Fox TV show, "Supreme Courtships" fly? Volokh has the plot summary for the pilot and it answers that question. [Volokh Conspiracy]

* Should lawyers blog? Tony Zirkle definitely shouldn't. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Justice Department giving up some more super secret interrogation method memos to Congress. "Too little and too late," says Sen. Russ Feingold (D-Wis.). [BLT]

* Yale 1L has an op-ed in the Washington Post about being nice. [Washington Post]

* Since it seems from this week's survey that some of you have put on the pounds, you might be interested in this self-commitment contract diet. If you don't lose weight, they take your money. [Convictions]

* Are Biglaw's boom times over? Not necessarily. [Law and More]

* Berkeley Law -- don't dare call it Boalt -- makes an exciting new faculty hire. [Is That Legal?]

* Could GMU Law sue the ABA? [PrawfsBlawg]

* Ex-judge Donald "Penis Pump" Thompson is back on the streets (but must register as a sex offender). [KTUL.com]

* Maybe Judge Thompson would have stayed out of trouble if a colleague had forced him to take estrogen. And that wouldn't have constituted sexual harassment. [Dealbreaker]

* Hit on a woman and get a free haircut. Saudi Arabia, is that the best punishment you can come up with? [ABC News]

* Vault and the Minority Corporate Counsel Association have created a new database for measuring law firm diversity. [Vault.com]

* Media turning to the Illinois Supreme Court to get into R. Kelly's case records. Really? More is needed than "R&B star," "sex," "videotape." and "13-year-old girl?" [Law.com]

* In other celebrity news, Spitzer's lady friend is back in the news with a $10 million suit against "Girls Gone Wild." [Law.com]

* Federal regulators shoot down "Try Legal Weed" as a beer slogan. [Snark Hunting]

* Torture chic? [Agenda Inc.]

* Blawg Review #157, on Canada's National Day of Mourning (in memory of "those workers whose lives have been lost or who have been injured in the workplace"). [Thoughts from a Management Lawyer via Blawg Review]

* It's the day you've all been waiting for: Records from Backstreet Boys litigation unsealed! [Courthouse News]

* PETA's not going to be happy about this one. Dolphin killed during a Sea World performance. [Local 6 News via Drudge]

* Sexual assault via telephone? [Quizlaw]

* We're not the only ones obsessed with Nina Totenberg. NPR sold out of their first run of Nina Totin' Bags. [NPR Shop]

* Will it be as marketable as a book on how NOT to get sued? [What About Clients?]

* "Your Honor, I Move To Strike Your Mother For Cause" [Deliberations]

* The winning bid for the Red Sox shirt buried in Yankee stadium was $175k, with the proceeds going to The Jimmy Fund. But what if the 174k over the asking price isn't actually tax-deductible? [TaxProf Blog]

* Musical Chairs: UVA hires constitutional law expert Frederick Schauer away from Harvard. [Virginia Law]

* This was too dirty for a full post, even for Kash. NY law firm Bivona & Cohen is pre-emptively suing a secretary who gave a partner a lap dance with a happy ending, and kept the "towel of proof." [Law.com]

* To anyone who has ever been criticized harshly or mocked -- e.g., in anonymous comments on the internets -- consider the wise words of Judge Richard Posner: "[P]eople do not have a legal right to prevent criticism of their beliefs or for that matter their way of life.” [Box Turtle Bulletin]

* What are the best -- and worst -- state lawsuit climates? [Institute for Legal Reform (press release); Institute for Legal Reform (rankings)]

* Lawrence Hurley wonders: "Do associates feel pressure to give political donations to candidates supported by senior partners?" [Washington Briefs]

* Forget about abortion-themed "art projects." THIS is why we have a First Amendment. [Legal Satyricon]

* A bar review question: What are the elements of "penis theft"? [Reuters]

Update: See also PrawfsBlawg. (Gavel bang: commenter.)

* Twinkie lovers, be grateful for Chapter 11. [Law and More]

* Lawsuit of Last Week? Daniel Schwartz's post title says it all: "Court Flushes Away Disability Claim; Finds Toilet-Training Book for Kids Not Enough to Create Hostile Work Environment." [Connecticut Employment Law Blog; WSJ Law Blog]

* Have you ever been punched by a client? [f/k/a via What About Clients?]

* How To Blog Like A Rock Star Canadian. [Stem Legal, also via What About Clients?]

* Barack Obama brushes it off -- literally. [YouTube (extended, non-PC version) or
YouTube (abbreviated, PC version); Washington Post]

* Speaking of Obama, this "top story" headline is not from the Onion: "Obama Questioner Explains Why She Finds Him Annoying." [McClatchy Newspapers]

* A shout-out for ATL from Benjamin Duranske, in Blawg Review #156. [Virtually Blind via Blawg Review]

* Inter-circuit benchslappery: Judge Stephen Reinhardt goes after Judge Richard Posner. [Drug and Device Law]

* And this is why we have the First Amendment. [Wonkette]

Update: See here. As one of you notes, the art project was a hoax of sorts.

* Most Screwed Victim in Caselaw History: time to vote! Yes, Mrs. Palsgraf is on the ballot -- but maybe you should go for a less obvious choice. [PrawfsBlawg]

* So where should blame be placed for the subprime mortgage meltdown? One possibility: the repeal of Glass-Steagall. [Consumerist]

* If you're an aspiring media type, here's a fellowship opportunity that might interest you. The deadline is May 8, and the application requires a bit of thought. So don't delay! [Atlantic Media Company]

* Not being "a dog person" is viewed in some quarters as downright un-American, borderline evil. But there are plenty of good reasons to harbor canine hostility. [Minnesota Lawyer Blog]

* BarBri books, put to good use. [Rumors Daily]

* The Troll Tracker litigation confuses us mightily. But for those of you who follow it, here's the latest. [The Prior Art]

* Our current base of operations, Washington, DC, is the second-smartest city in the United States. Maybe it's because of all the lawyers in this town. [Althouse]

* Duke law students think we are "[s]eedy, crass, and sticky" -- high praise for a self-described "legal tabloid." We're blushing! [Devil's Advocate]

[Ed. note: Some of you noticed the unusually low number of comments today. This was because of a technical problem that allowed only registered commenters, not anonymous "guests," to post. It appears that the problem has been fixed now (knock on wood). So go ahead, anonymous commenters -- heap abuse on us. We missed you!]

* Still more schemes for ranking law schools: by the quality of their student bodies, and by how generous they are with scholarship money. [Leiter's Law School Rankings ; TaxProf Blog]

* Obama uttered his ill-fated "bitter" remarks at the mega-mansion of a billionaire. [Blogonaut]

* Speaking of Obama, ex-AG Ashcroft referred to him as "Osama." Whoops. [Wonkette]

* And speaking of Wonkette, our former blog stomping grounds will be under new ownership soon. [Politico; Fishbowl DC]

* Blawg Review #155: Greg May waxes poetic, in honor of National Poetry Month. [California Blog of Appeal via Blawg Review]

*50 Cent and Universal sued for promoting a "gangsta lifestyle." [Reuters]

*News from New York: Chief Judge Judith Kaye is filing a lawsuit for raises for all state judges, with assistance from former White House counsel, Bernard Nussbaum of Wachtell. [The New York Sun]

*No more Wordpress for Brazil? [Concurring Opinions]

*Notre Dame's law school dean is stepping down, despite the school's climb to #22 in the U.S. News and World Report rankings. [The Observer]

*London's Magic Circle law firms. America, beware. [What About Clients?]

*In a survey of UVA's 1990 law school grads, 86% are satisfied with life. The other 14% may be the ones still in Biglaw. The income of the top 25% of the class is three times that of the bottom 25%. Study up! [Virginia Law via TaxProf Blog]

* AG Mukasey looks super-old, but at least his front office is fresh-faced. [Washington Post]

* An apple pie we can understand, but a picnic table? [NBC10.com]

* Who knew? Blogging can be lethal. We need to find ourselves a good plaintiffs' attorney. [Jeremy Blachman; New York Times]

* Somehow, some bloggers survive -- and thrive. Belated birthday wishes to the PrawfsBlawg crew. [PrawfsBlawg]

* In case you're wondering, PrawfsBlawg is #14 on the latest Law Prof Blog Rankings. [TaxProf Blog]

* Proof of prejudice, via a video game? [Mediation Channel]

* "947 years they can never get back." (And no, this has nothing to do with Biglaw associates.) [Innocence Blog]

* If tax time is making you unhappy, find relief in some of these tax tracks, from Steven Zelin, The Singing CPA. [The Singing CPA via TaxProf Blog]

* We linked to them previously (via the Volokh Conspiracy), but in case you missed them, here are some interesting interviews with eight Supreme Court justices, conducted by legal writing guru Bryan Garner. [LawProse]

* Blawg Review #154. Did you know that yesterday was World Health Day? [HealthBlawg via Blawg Review]

*Law school proved to be an excellent investment for the Clintons. [The Washington Post]

*Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg will face a lawsuit that accuses him of stealing computer code, rules the U.S. Court of Appeals in Boston. We checked and the "Zuckerberg is innocent" Facebook group only has 193 members. [Bloomberg via How Appealing]

*Hill staffers want legal action to protect their personal lives. [The Hill]

*Google is always running into privacy trouble. They have been sued by a Pennsylvania couple for the Google Street Views feature. [WSJ Blog]

*Naomi Campbell in trouble with the law... again. Campbell being arrested is barely novel news, but it gives us an excuse to post her photo. [Breitbart via Drudge]

*Attorneys general react to financial crisis, telling failing businesses to be sure to shred personal documents on the way out. [Law.com]

*The president of the California State Bar wants to do away with billable hours. [California Bar Journal]

*Chicago recently got love from Ropes & Gray; now it's getting some love from Proskauer Rose. [Chicago Tribune]

*This German law professor is heading to prison, but if he gets to keep his newly-renovated Hamburg mansion, maybe he doesn't mind. [TaxProf Blog]

*We question the legality of this new version of street justice in New York. "You must first plead your case, by submitting a plea on Punch's web site for why the prospective punchee deserves violence." [Thrillist]

*Covington & Burling's Lanny Breuer gets profiled for being the "go-to guy" for Sandy Berger, Roger Clemens, and Charles Prince (not to be confused with Prince Charles). [The Washingtonian]

*If you were disappointed by your law school's ranking this year in U.S. News and World Report, perhaps you'd prefer a 14-year-long historical perspective. [TaxProf Blog]

*Huh? Yesterday was April Fools' Day? Okay, yes, Fantasy Baseball post was a joke (more details at the ABA Journal), but sadly our Blackberry post was not. [ABA Journal]

*As we had hoped, cross dressing bankruptcy judge Robert Somma is rethinking his decision to resign. [The Boston Globe]

*The Broward County courts sound like they are ready to host a reality TV show: pot-smoking, insensitivity on the bench, slurs about sexual orientation... Now for some musical chairs. [Daily Business Review]

*DOJ is investigating whether sexual orientation played a part in attorney firings. "To some people, that's even worse than being a Democrat." [TPMMuckraker]

*When deciding which law job to take, you may want to factor in the number of opposite sex singles living in the cities you're considering. [Jezebel]

* Better late than never: data on New Jersey lawyers finally released to lawyer ratings site Avvo. [AP]

* Speaking of the Garden State, Judge Fred Kieser Jr. would have been a great Lawyer of the Day (if we hadn't missed this when it came out last month). [NJ.com]

* "[I]n a move designed to show that it is doing its part in the global war on terrorism, China announced today a crackdown on counterfeit designer handbags...." [Securing Innovation]

* News you can use (if you have dreams of legal academia): teaching fellowships for aspiring law professors. [TaxProf Blog]

* If you're STILL not tired of talking about those U.S. News law school rankings -- and we're finally sensing some fatigue, since our last post didn't even generate 100 comments -- here are a few more links:

  * "The Contradictory Goals of Law School Rankings" [Concurring Opinions (Dan Solove)]

  * "An Open Letter to Bob Morse of U.S. News" [Brian Leiter's Law School Reports]

  * "US News Hacked?: Does the US News Web Site Display 3rd Tier & 4th Tier Law Schools Ranked in Order?" [PrawfsBlawg (Geoffrey Rapp)]

* The 2008 April Fool's Blawg Review Appendix. [a fool in the forest via Blawg Review]